Tongue Biter.

“Are you kidding me, have you even been listening at all!” – Don’t act like those thoughts or thoughts like it haven’t ever crossed through your mind during a meeting, a phone call, an email, or even just during a hallway conversation. We are all “guilty” of the mind wandering face slapping thoughts that we sometimes battle in our heads. Do you ever speak them outloud?

For some people and their thoughts I really hope that you don’t, but if you do, you may not have to handle it anymore because you probably aren’t working with that person or group anymore. While we may have those thoughts you always have to remember there is a time, a place, and a manner to deal with issues. Working with others isn’t always going to work out well, but why not? When starting a new business relationship you need to learn how the relationship is going to work and how you are going to make it work by learning about your new business partner, new company, or whatever relationship it may be.

Maybe the person doesn’t have the best personality to match yours, maybe yours is the unpleasent personality. Maybe they don’t meet deadlines, maybe you don’t. What if they have a hygenine issue. Possibly they don’t have all of the knowledge that is needed for the project. Maybe they take ownership of things without allowing others in. Maybe you don’t believe in the project or groups scope/purpose.

No matter what the case may be you have to learn to manage the frustration and still be able to build and grow that relationship. Throwing in the towel isn’t an option unless you don’t want to be an option. We have all had the hard to deal with business partners and we all have even been those people at some point in time. Each person or group has to bring to the table an open mind, a good tongue biting behavior when it is a appropriate and a professional attitude.

You do not fight, verbally or physically. You do not degrade someone. You act like a poised adult and the professional you want to be. What you don’t want to be that poised professional adult? Well then don’t be surprised when you are not sought after or requested for things.

Always remember that just because you have knowledge doesn’t mean that you are a no brainer choice. You have to encompass the full package, you have to share the knowledge, you have to be a good kind human that is an open door.

Remember…BITE THAT TONGUE! Be the person you want to be and the person you want someone else to be with you.

Take a step back

Sometimes, most the time, you just need to take a step back. What are you doing when you take this step back, why is it needed? You need to find the bigger picture. 

  • What is driving you
  • What are your goals
  • What are you company goals
  • Where is the path least traveled
  • Where are the blind spots
  • Where do you have areas you can improve in
  • Where are you not sharing your knowledge
  • Where can you take on more

Seeing the bigger picture is calming, it is like reaching a long awaited destination and just being able to spread your arms and breathe. 

Don’t get stuck in the sigh of relief too long because that bigger picture just got bigger. There is always more, the photo is always changing and never a fully finished piece. You don’t want it to ever be finished. Your goals must always change, your drive must always change, the demand must always change. There is always another turn. 

Don’t get defeated, embrace it and when you start to struggle just remember to take that step back and embrace the current bigger picture. 

Busy as Bees..Do I eat?

Meeting here, meeting there, 5 formed emails there, 15 replies here, walk in meeting, document review over there… With our overly packed calendars where do we squeeze in eating? 

Food = Necessity! 

You can’t skip but really it is a pressing question. You may take food or plan to grab something but end up leaving at the end of the day caring that fully packed meal and/or a grumbling stomach. 

People apologize for booking over a lunch hour but really what is a lunch hour? Go ahead book that time, it doesn’t matter anyway! 

All jokes aside how do you manage a meal squeeze in? Is it realistic? Eating in meetings? Cold food? Hot food? Healthy food? Fast food? 

GREAT QUESTIONS! 

I am a prime example of you MAKE your meal times work. I have a VERY full calendar but I find and make the time to eat 6 small meals a day. While at the office I eat 3 times! Yes 3!! AND I drink a gallon of water a day while at the office!! 

Ok how? I plan it, every meal has a time, every meal is prepped the night before and ready to go in our work fridge or on my desk. I bring in a gallon water jug so I can pour and go. I eat breakfast as soon as I wake up. My daytime meals aren’t always consumed on one sitting but consumed. 

DO NOT EAT IN MEETINGS! Unless food is provided. Eating in a meeting is not looked highly upon. You should be prepared to work and with a mouth full of food how can you speak and provide your weight in work?

Pre pack it. Plan it. Time it. Bring it. Eat it. 

It is hard but possible! 

Sometimes you just have to take time

As I sit here stretching out my arms after a very long evening I know that the break I had taken from posting was necessary. Sometimes you really need to remember to think about yourself when it comes to what you allow onto your plate.

After March and my work journey to India I found myself sitting back and reflecting and really thinking about what my next moves were and what I needed and wanted to tackle. I had things moving like storm clouds in my personal life and I had a strategic game of chess going on at work. I needed to settle my brain, think and plan things out. A month later and I am back reading to go!

What has changed you may ask, well really not a whole lot but mentally I am ready to take on whatever pieces move next. I have a plan, I have a self directed direction, I have more drive.

The key to sanity is reminding  yourself that you can’t control it all. Remembering that you may not see the whole painting in the beginning but it will reveal itself when it is time. Until you can see the full photo earn it. You have to push and earn it through every step of the way. You can’t do the work a few times and expect that is enough to prove your worth until the end. Every day, every task, every moment has to be thought out.

Enjoy the journey but earn it!

How do you find the time?

This is a very common question that I hear, how do I find the time to post? It is a great question because really what do you think of when you read this, that I am sitting at my home office or my office at my company and having the free time to just sit and write, we will say for 30 minutes. Well I wish that were the case but it really isn’t and for most of us that wouldn’t be an option.

So how do we tackle the side “projects” outside of our full-time work and our family/house work? I recently heard a speaker state that there is always time and you shouldn’t make an excuse that you are too busy because it just means that you don’t have your priorities in the right order. While I agree with that comment I also don’t agree with it. We are humans, humans that sometimes want to get something done and sometimes are just too tired or overwhelmed to be able to follow through with the long to do lists. We pick and choose what that day or week will hold, what we will accomplish, and what we are fine letting pass us by.

So back to the original question, how do I find the time? I make the time..for me that means I write while on my phone, I write while I have a couple of minutes on the desktop, I write while my son is in the shower. No one post is just a full constant sitting, I don’t arrange for the time of complete dedication at one sitting I multi-task. If the laundry has a couple minutes left on it then I will pull out my phone and continue my posting, while my son is in the shower (like right now) I will hop on the computer and type a little bit. I want to find the time for you.

Over the years I have made excuse after excuse as to why I wasn’t pushing for the career or life goals that I wanted, there was always the thought that it would come later it would just land on my lap. Well 4 years ago I came to my senses and realized ya right this isn’t a movie so I pushed myself. I wanted more so I wanted to earn more. Yes I am still struggling my way through my career plan, changing it as I go but I am pushing through it. I have made some huge steps in my career in a very short amount of time and with that dedication I have found that people want help, they want my guidance. I am more than willing to share in my trial and tribulations, but how do I help the people who aren’t able to ask directly? So this is where I am. This blog was that answer. I want people to share it, I want people to reach out to me, I want to answer your questions that you didn’t even know to ask. So I find the time, for you.

My life isn’t easy but it isn’t a cake walk by any means. I have a full-time job (that I love), I have a husband, and a child, AND I run our house. Running the house means laundry, cleaning, cooking, homework, yard work, etc. So when I say I make the time I really do. I find those moments of silence that let me mind run wild and try to answer the questions that are spooling through your heads. I don’t write everyday, as you can see, but I try and write every week. If you want more ask for more and I will give you more.

So as the speaker said, I put my priorities in the right order. You are a priority, I am a priority.

Traveling for Business

Well here I am..sitting on my couch, in my pajamas, wrapped in a blanket, with 2 (two) 12 ounce cranberry red bulls (yes I said two). I think in a minute I may need to grab the tape and tape my eyelids open or maybe even jump to the stapler. Why am I so tired you may ask, good question, I am just back from a week long trip to India for business. This was my personal first time traveling out of the country for business so of course since I am a crazy pre-planner I did plenty of research before hand on what to eat, what to pack, what to wear, culture beliefs, and everything in between. What did I learn? I learned that there are sooo many different view points on what are needed but nothing very recent and nothing (in my opinion) from someone who really went there for a business. So let me give you my two cents…Now before we get deep into my list let me tell you that I am an adventurous person and I am more than happy to cross a line and try something new.

India trip suggestions::


WEATHER
As you can tell by the date I went in the middle of March to the Delhi area (within an hour of it), March is when their weather starts to get warmer but hasn’t reached their hot season yet. It was mid 90s the whole time I was there, sometimes pretty windy. Yes that is considered cool or not hot yet.

ATTIRE
The Indian culture finds respect in women not showing anything above the knee and not showing their shoulders. Business suits would be found to be most respectful for all residents of the country. You will see women wearing a variety of outfits, showing legs and showing shoulders, but it is still best to try and respect all possible views and believes. All colors are fine to wear, bright colors fit in wonderfully.  Hotel rooms will most likely have an iron that you can press any laundry or you can send away for it to be serviced by the hotel.

FOOD
If you do not like spice you must speak up! They are very accommodating at the restaurants if you tell them ahead of time. Be cautious eating from the street vendors because you don’t know how the food was prepared. It is suggested to not consume raw fruits and vegetables. Water should only be drank from water bottles that you personally opened or you watched a server open. Most 4-5 star hotels will provide you with water on a daily basis so that you have fresh bottles for the day. When going out to eat ask for sparkling water or bottled water. Soda is fine as well as long as from a can. You should not have ice since it would have been from the water that didn’t go through proper purification.

TRAVEL
Early warning the driving in this country is much different than many others. They do have rules of the road but they are not strictly followed as in other countries. Cars/bikes/mopes/buses will “push” through to get moving ahead. Vehicles will get very close to the side of other vehicles and honking is a common form of getting someones attention. The honking of the horns is not a sign of anger but more just used as a recognition that someone is coming close. Hotels can pre-arrange a vehicle for travel but most host companies should be arranging for service for you. Security checks will happen at most facilities. Vehicles will be checked, bags, and a body scan or pat down. Do not resist as things will go much smoother if you understand what is being done and are cooperative.

SLEEPING
Most offices will working through the evenings to match another countries day time hours. Doing this can be beneficial so that you can match and keep your normal sleep hours but can also become an issue because of the sun light vs darkness. No matter what time you work in the office you should try and get some rest. Falling asleep and staying asleep will most likely not be easy. You can take a sleep aide but make sure you allow for plenty of time to sleep. I suggest setting a routine, turning off all lights and electronics, and letting your mind relax. Once you are in a full state of relaxation you will find it easier to begin sleeping.

BATHROOMS
Every bathroom that I went into had a spray station. These are not required to be used but are provided as an option. Be respectful to not make comments to anyone locally regarding these. You may not understand or use them but that doesn’t mean you need to disrespect their usage of them. If you stop at a public convenience there is a major possibility that they will be out of toilet paper, having some tissues on hand at all time will enable that you can use any restroom. It is not uncommon to see men using the restroom on the side of the road, pay no attention.

SHOES
Women: I wore heels, wedges really, and had no issues. If you do not like being stared at for being tall I suggest short wedges/heels or flats. I personally am a shorter individual and found that with 4″ wedges I received a lot of attention for my height. Most roads in most cities have paved roads but no real sidewalks.

TRAVEL
I suggest flying or driving as if you had to walk into a meeting. Being dressed accordingly allows that if you run into anyone you look presentable, if any luggage is lost you have an outfit on your back that you would be able to go into a meeting, and if for any reason your transportation is behind schedule you can walk straight into a client meeting. Flying or driving you can stop before your destination to freshen up so make sure you have items on hand to make your look appear freshly done. Rest stops or airplane bathrooms will do. Lint roller, tooth brush, mints, small amount of perfume or cologne.

When traveling for business, no matter the destination, do some research. It is always good to be aware of any culture believes, weather, and road conditions. It is better to over pack than under pack. If you don’t have something you may not be able to get it but if you have too much of something that is better to be safe than sorry. Always be the best image for your company. You want people to remember you being there so don’t wear something that would make them negatively remember you.

Happy travels!!

 

Be a tourist

Some of us have the pleasure of traveling for our business, whether that means traveling with our country or traveling internationally.  No matter where it is that your work is taking you remember to take a moment and enjoy the city that you are in.

It is very easy to get wrapped up in your work and the very strict agenda that may be placed in front of you but you need to try and find the time to break away from the pack. Finding time for yourself to venture out allows you to find a break from the madness of work, help with the travel demands on your body and mind, and also allows you to see the city you are given the pleasure to be in.

Being a tourist while traveling for business doesn’t mean that you have to act like a tourist. I suggest really researching and understanding the place that you are traveling to so that you understand and can travel around with the best knowledge under your belt.

Always remember to respect the new city that you are in, their beliefs and customs.

Enjoy and make those memories!